pray and let it be "fats"....

took the little girl to the clinic last monday cus she was have diarrhea. i usually just monitor her when she was having diarrhea cus it usually just meant that she is popping new teeth and it usually clears up after a day or two. what made me worried was she pooped in the wee hours which she havent done so since 3 months old. so i was worried that it might be serious even though she seems her happy usual self.

do you know that there is no medicine for child below 2 for diarrhea?

#baby101

anyway the doctor was checking her tummy and found a uneven bump on the right side of her belly button. she was concern and felt that it should not be left un-diagnosed. so she wrote a referral letter and told me to bring her straight to the a&e.

at the triage, the nurse examined her and explained her condition in layman terms. we got to see the doctor within 20mins (WOW!)

the a&e doctor is quite sure that it is just fats. -_-"
but has schedule her to see a specialist tomorrow just to be sure is nothing else.



taken from the mayoclinic.org:

An umbilical hernia occurs when part of the intestine protrudes through an opening in the abdominal muscles. Umbilical hernia is a common and typically harmless condition. Umbilical hernias are most common in infants, but they can affect adults as well. In an infant, an umbilical hernia may be especially evident when the infant cries, causing the baby's bellybutton to protrude. This is a classic sign of an umbilical hernia.

Many umbilical hernias close on their own by age 1, though some take longer to heal. To prevent complications, umbilical hernias that don't disappear by age 3 or those that appear during adulthood may need surgical repair.

its been a month and i still will tear up when i think about her.
found this photo yesterday while doing up some photo calender for the parents.

us at a happier time. :)

in here, she looks as pretty and happy as long as i can remember.

am really missing her so much now... 

the ages that define the life of every woman

interesting read ;)

12 The average age at which a girl becomes a woman is 12 years and seven months — although the exact timing of her first period will follow that of her mother, according to scientists at the University of London. They found that genes play the dominating role in the onset of menstruation, along with physical and environmental factors.
14 Forget the terrible twos. With hormones kicking in, a girl is at her most tricky to deal with at the age of 14. Parents of teens interviewed for one study claimed that sulkiness and tantrums hit their peak at this age, due to conflicts over boys, make-up and drinking.
16 A year after her first kiss, at an average age of 15, the next important landmark for a girl will be losing her virginity. It seems that the age of consent is still relevant, because for most girls, it’s still 16 — a year after the average age for boys.
18 Having lost her virginity two years earlier, by the age of 18 a young woman is by now sexually experienced enough to enjoy her first orgasm with a partner.
20 Even though the average girl today has been sexually active for four years by this stage, ideally she should have waited until 20 for the best chance of happy future relationships. Researchers at the University of Texas found those who waited to have their first lover were better educated, went on to have better paid jobs and enjoyed more satisfying marriages.
22 The bland foods we liked as children are no longer enough to suit a woman’s more adventurous palette. Tastebuds stop regenerating as quickly at this age, enabling us to find stronger flavours, such as anchovies, more palatable.
25 You may not be able to tell from looking at pop star Taylor Swift, but 25 is the lowest point for a woman’s sexual confidence, due to worries about not having the perfect body and comparisons with how other women perform in bed.
27 Women will fall in love on average four times during a lifetime and most will ‘settle down’ at the age of 27 — with a third being lucky enough to stick with their first love.
28 Although many women are in long-term relationships by this age, it seems the desire to play the field is still strong. This is the point when they are most likely to cheat on their partners.
29 The best age for a woman to snap up a property with her partner. This gives her time to upgrade to a bigger home when babies come along, and also means she’ll be mortgage-free by 61, according to an HSBC report.
30 It’s not always clear which comes first these days — but as well as 30 being the most common age for a woman to marry in the UK, official statistics say it’s now also the average age for a woman to have her first baby.
32 After years of chopping and changing, it’s at 32 that women finally achieve their perfect hairstyle.
34 This is the best possible age at which to give birth. Sociologists looking at the birth experiences of 3,000 women for the Journal of Health and Social Behaviour found that those who delayed having a child until now had fewer complications (before the risks start to rise again with age), and were also more emotionally mature and financially secure.
35 As they juggle work and parenthood, this is the age when women feel most stressed. If a woman hasn’t become a parent now after trying, it’s also at this age that she is most likely to start IVF, reports the Human Fertilisation and Embryology Authority.
38 After getting their feet under the desk, 38 is the prime age to take a career break or go travelling. Researchers found that by now women feel financially stable and sufficiently well-established to take a break without their career paying the price.
39 The average woman will be getting her highest salary now, but over a lifetime in work, she will earn 20 per cent less than a man in the same role, according to EU statistics.
40 Life has to begin (again) at 40 for many women because this is the average age at which she is most likely to divorce, according to the Office for National Statistics. Men will be 43 at the time of their first marital break-up.
47 Helen Mirren may not have got the memo before she was so memorably pictured in a two-piece red swimsuit at the age of 62. But 47 is the oldest age that most women feel comfortable in a bikini — going for one-pieces on their next birthday. It is also the age when women believe their looks begin ‘fading fast’.
49 It’s time to slip back into baby mode for many women at this age. This is the birthday when you are most likely to become a grandmother for the first time, report researchers at the Future Foundation. During her lifetime, the average granny will go on to have 4.07 grandchildren.
50 There are mixed blessings for women at 50. The good news is that it’s the average age when women become debt free, due to a combination of rising salaries and being left an inheritance. But visible signs of old age are advancing fast. While men tend to start going grey at the temples, women are also likely to be greying at their partings. A study published by the British Journal of Dermatology found that by 50, between 63 and 78 per cent had some grey hair.
51 This is the age at which most women finally stop having periods. It may not be a coincidence that this is the also the age when women believe they become invisible to men, who stop giving them appreciative smiles or open doors for them.
52 There may be a good reason that, at this age, actress Demi Moore looks so youthful. Saga magazine found that this is the moment when women are most prepared to entertain the idea of plastic surgery, with eyelid lifts being the most common procedure, followed by facelifts and dermabrasion.
55 At this stage in her life, a woman most feels like the filling in life’s sandwich. A University of London study which followed the lives of more than 17,000 women born in the same week found that 55-year-old women take on the lion’s share of caring responsibilities for younger and older relatives. On the upside, 55 is also the average age of British millionaires, around 40 per cent of whom are women.
58 It may have been a long time coming, but it turns out that 58 is the age women feel they have finally got that elusive work-life balance under control. A study found this is when we start to take proper lunch breaks at work, cut back on overtime and also get the right amount of leisure to enjoy our lives.
60 With more time to relax and no worries about pregnancy, it seems making love continues to be a popular pastime in the later years. Thirty-seven per cent of married people over 60 make love once a week or more, and 16 per cent make love several times a week, according to research.
63 Sixty-three years and one month is the age when women finally start to take things easy and retire if they are still working, according to the Department for Work and Pensions. Men keep earning until they are 64 and seven months.
65 It seems we never lose hope in love. A study by Age UK found that almost one in ten single people over 65 are keen to embark on a new sexual relationship. If they are already in a relationship, one in eight — 12 per cent — said they would like to try new things in bed with their partner.
82 Average female life expectancy is now up to 82.9 years — a rise of nearly 12 months compared to 2007 and nearly four years more than men.

source: http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-3001438/The-ages-define-life-woman-new-study-reveals-female-milestones.html

***


so i am left with 52 years to go.. not too long nor short.. hmm.

the little camper was in my bed this morning. again.

anyway, she has been on most nights for the past week - with her blanket and the huge bear.

this time round, she really had something important to tell me at 5.39am. 

she babbled and babbled.. i was afraid if i opened my eyes, she will never close her's again. but she was not giving up. she patted my shoulders and tried to pry open my eyes.. O.o

ok fine. maybe she was just asking me if she could sleep with us. 

with half-opened eyes, i asked her what she wanted. i gave her a kiss and told her to go back to sleep. the next moment i peeped at her, she was fast asleep again.

why am i aching and feeling bruised today...

the past few days have been a whirlwind. 

i wanted time to pass quickly and yet i dreaded the inevitable moment. 

i wanted to grieve and yet i do not want rosanne to be affect by my sadness.

i am glad that her sufferings are over and yet i miss her badly.

***

26 feb.

你已向蓝天百云飘去。

***

這一生最美的祝福

在無數的黑夜裡
我用星星畫出你
你的恩典如晨星
讓我真實的見到你
在我的歌聲裡
我擁音符讚美你
你的美好是我今生頌揚的


這一生最美的祝福
就是能認識主耶穌
這一生最美的祝福
就是能信靠主耶穌
走在高山深谷
他會伴我同行
我知道這是最美的祝福

***

大哥哥和二哥哥常常調皮搗蛋惹她生氣。
有一次她忍得不可忍，在我面前把他們訓了一頓。
過了一會兒， 她把我拉到一旁，靜悄悄地問我：
“你有沒有被嚇到？我會不會罵得太兇？”

她讓我看到做父母的苦心。

*

she once caught her sons folding paper tissue flowers with me instead of revising their work.

she was upset and reprimanded them. they went back to the room and she went back to the kitchen.

shortly later, she emerged with a much larger paper tissue flower than the ones her sons have folded.

and we all ended up folding flowers. 

this is her. 

always finding fun and it was fun being around her.

*

it is easy to laugh and be happy when you have everything.
but will you still smile when life is hard and bitter?

她这一生，過著簡單的生活。
天天不停的在她縫衣機忙，就是為了糊口、把儿子养大。
但她从来不怨言，还常常笑口常开。

她教会了我什麼是苦中作樂。

*

i will always remember the lessons you have taught me and i will never forget you.
rest in peace.